Cutting Down on Negative People at Work-Workplace Negativity

BusinessManagement

  • Author Crystal Jonas
  • Published October 17, 2010
  • Word count 764

Workplace negativity exists even in the best organizations.

Here's the funny part. Although everyone admits to having negativity at work, no one ever admits to being part of the problem. Kinda makes you wonder where all that negativity is coming from, doesn't it?

Let's make sure that you have some concrete tips on cutting down on negativity in the workplace by starting where you have the most power to control the situation: and that's with you personally.

The best contribution you can make to cutting down on negativity is to make sure you aren't part of the problem.

Consider this: You're having a rotten day. The last three customers were evil incarnate. One yelled at you, the second blamed you for something that wasn't even your fault, and the third called you unprofessional and asked to speak to your boss. This day is not going well.

You can imagine wanting to talk about this, can't you?

Wait just a minute, though!

Before you take this to the next cubicle, think about how your venting is going to make you look and your conversational partner feel. It's said that people have"an infinite capacity for self-deception." Pretty powerful statement. Can you think of all the places this statement is true? OK, don't think about too long! It can be a bit of a downer!

Just for a moment, though, consider how one's infinite capacity for self-deception impacts what a person does when she's in a bad mood.

While it's oh so easy to see the character flaws in others, it's not so easy to see them in ourselves.

The biggest reason you might not have thought twice about sharing your bad day with others is because it truly was a bad day! Those customers were genuinely rude and disrespectful, anyone would agree with you!

What you need to know though is that others weren't witness to the last four hours of your day when it took every ounce of energy you had to handle those customers professionally. Your co-workers are not in on the context of the situation.

They only see the here and now. They don't see the "back story". So, your acting up and acting out right now is taken completely out of context.

I always say, your reputation is based on brief snapshots in time, taken completely out of context.

This is not a good situation for anyone who feels like venting about this difficult day, for two main reasons.

First, your co-workers didn't see the events leading up to your bad mood, all they see is your bad mood, and my friends, no body looks good when they're in a bad mood.

Secondly, the only way they could hope to understand your bad mood is if you tell them the "back story" behind your bad mood. And as I always tell my clients, nobody cares about your BS (that stands for "back story" of course!)

Follow this thread for a moment: when you're having a bad day, that leads to complaining, and complaining is perceived as negativity.

No other way around it. Complaining is negative. Now, here's the biggest irony. The more legitimately bad your day has been, and the more justified you feel in getting it off your chest, the harder it is to listen to.

Think about it.

Remember the last time a co-worker of yours was having a bad day and was going on about it? Did you feel drained and think to yourself, "Oh please, let this be over soon!" Or did you say, "Gee, I really hope she goes on for another 20 minutes and keeps saying the same thing again and again." Probably not the latter, right?

You know that it's draining to be on the receiving end of someone being negative, no matter what the reason! It takes something from you, emotional energy.

You know what it's like to spend all of your energy at work, because you've done it before. And by the time you get home, you don't have any energy left for family, friends or yourself.

Remember that when you're having a bad day and you chose to tell others about it, you are taking away some of their energy, hurting your reputation, and adding to workplace negativity.

What to do with that bad day experience? Put it in the vault until you're alone or with people who love you enough to give up some of their energy to support you.

Follow this guidance, and you'll be sure to cut down on negativity at work and you'll preserve your well-deserved professional reputation.

Crystal Jonas, "The People Skills Lady" Teaches people to express themselves at their best so they can be more productive and profitable. For info on coaching with Crystal, go to http://crystalconsults.com Email crystal and sign up for her free newsletters while you're there.

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