Ok, you are going through a hard time in your life. I always felt that a hard breakup was in many cases, as painful as, or even more painful than experiencing a death of a loved one. When you lose someone to death, you normally have a whole band of friends and family to help you get through the process; often times when you lose your girlfriend or boyfriend you are forced to get through it all alone. Also, when you are left by your girlfriend or boyfriend after a serious relationship; not only are you loosing someone you love, but you are watching them live their life with others, while you can barley take the next breath.

If you are going through this process, I hope this can help you get your ex back and put this pain away for good.

The good news is there are ways to get your ex back; but it goes against all intuition and most will immediately muck things up even worse.

First off if you have been broken up with, read this so you don't make things even worse. What I am talking about is this, you heard the stories from your friends, "He called 50 times and left 20 messages last night", "My ex just called me drunk off her but, crying and begging me to come back", "How many times is he going to keep texting me?".

We all go a little crazy at times, but acting crazy is the first step to making things even worse. Act calm and confident, pull yourself together and read the rest of this article so you can get on the right track.

Don't get broken up with; instead be the one to do the breaking up.

This is all about showing confidence, and wanting what you can't have. When he or she is telling you that they want to end it; stop – remain calm, and say "You know, you are absolutely right, I have been thinking this for some time now, and didn't know how to tell you. I think this is the best thing for us."

Don't worry this is the first step, not the last. Trust me – it is unconventional and counter intuitive, but it is using basic physical emotion to its fullest and trust me it works.

Imagine if you were breaking up with someone, how would you respond if the person you were not interested in, started calling you 20 times a day; stopping over to give you flowers, calling you late at night crying, texting you over and over again; that would drive you away even further – wouldn't it. It would reconfirm all the reasons why you broke up with them in the first place.

Now imagine how you would react if they said, they agree and actually where thinking the same thing. It would make quite a large difference on how you feel, wouldn't it.

But this is only setting the stage. Like I said it is the 1st step and not the last.

Ok, but you are saying, "That's great, but it is a little too late, I already made a fool of myself." Well here is how you handle that, write a short hand written note and mail it to them.

Make it say something like this: "You know I'm sorry the other day, I got a little crazy and I apologize. The more I think about it, you are exactly right. I agree that we shouldn't see each other anymore and splitting up is probably the best thing for the both of us."

REMEMBER: This is the opening move, not the end of the game. People always want what they can't have!