Imagine this scenario. You’re in an upscale restaurant with a couple of friends. You're talking, laughing, and having a couple of drinks. There’s nothing remarkable about it. This is a monthly ritual and everything is proceeding according to plan. Then it happens. You look across the room and you spot him. You casually scan your table to make sure your rivals haven’t seen your prey or the mesmerizing eyes that have returned your glance. You slowly rise in an attempt you make your move. He sees you coming and smiles. There's nothing wrong with that. It is perfectly normal for us to seek the attention an attractive person. Flirting is a natural reaction to someone that is appealing to us, but for some of us, it doesn't end there and that's where the dilemma begins.

If we were thinking clearly, we would know that nine times out of ten, this action is going to lead to a dead- end. However, our logical mind is not in control. We are at the mercy of our hormones; what about that tenth time? That is the guiding force, right? This is the one where attraction leads to dating, falling in love and finally matrimonial bliss. "I know this is the one." We tell ourselves. When are we ever going to learn that animal attraction does not always equal compatibility or love? Sex before friendship is the reason most relationships are doomed from inception and eventually fail.

It sounds confusing. You might say to yourselves that dating is a modified version of friendship. It’s getting to know someone before you decide if he or she is the one. There's no better way to accomplish this than to date. When you make a decision to date someone, you go into it knowing that eventually the relationship is going to become intimate.

For some, there’s nothing wrong with that. Casual sex is second nature. Try to think about the next statement without being defensive. Try to change your way of thinking for just a moment. If you’re just friends, a sexual relationship is out of the question. However, if you give it more thought, you would conclude that with the absence of sex, you could concentrate on why you were attracted to that person in the first place. That is your foundation and you could build from there.

In several instances, that’s where it would end. You would find out that there was nothing below the surface and not even a friendship is applicable. If there is more, there’s no pressure. Your sole purpose for being together is to enjoy each other’s company and have a good time. By now, you are probably asking yourself, "What if I am so attracted that I want to become intimate?" The response is simply this: If this is the one, why rush it. Take your time and do it right.

The difference between friendship and dating is simple; sex and the continuous pressure of this undying question. "Is this my partner for life?" Whether you want to believe it or not, you know, it is the truth. If you don’t have that on your mind, you can relax and concentrate on other things; things that might slip your mind when you’re constantly worrying about monogamy, or if you share similar views on marriage, religion, and raising children. The list continues.

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