Romantic fantasies are a great escape. It's nice to relax and let your mind drift, but it's important to recognize the difference between fantasy and reality. As women we sometimes expect our men to behave or reproduce what we see in our minds eye. This can be dangerous. . . when has anyone ever lived up to one of your fantasies? I'm sure that many women would have shattered images of "Edward" if they ever really got the opportunity to date Robert Pattinson. Sorry, don't hate me.

In reality there is no such thing as a romantic dream come true. The truth is, that in any type of relationship we have to work to make our romance stay alive and keep it fresh. Romance is like a garden; you have to tend to it daily or it will begin to wilt. Don't get the wrong idea, I'm not saying that there is no such thing as chemistry or truly romantic gestures, I'm simply saying that fantasies don't just come true on a whim. Romantic gestures can be learned, it's all about knowing what you and your spouse want and need in a relationship.

It is true that people, even those who are entrenched in routine, can be spontaneous. But knowing that your spouse can be spontaneous and understanding their core characteristics are two completely different things. If your husband is the kind of guy you can set a clock to, then waiting for him to spontaneously surprise you with a truly romantic gesture is probably going to leave you disappointed more often than not. I know you've heard this before, but communication really is the key. Most women who are left disappointed by their husband's lack of romanticism would probably be astonished to find out that their spouses are completely ignorant to the fact.

If you really want to incorporate elements of your fantasies into your real life relationship then you need to make a conscious effort to introduce the two. I guarantee your partner isn't a mind reader. Men are typically not subtle creatures, so you need to paint a clear picture of what you're looking for in regards to intimacy. The key is time, patients and communication.

Romantic Realities are built on a foundation of what your genuine expectations from your lover are. Nobody is perfect, including yourself, so keep in mind that you and your spouse may not always be on the same page when it comes to intimacy. Like many aspects of a relationship compromises must be made. This doesn't mean settling for less that what you desire, it is more about finding the realistic range of expectations and building on them. Going back to the "garden" reference it's like planting seeds for new and exciting things that will blossom.

If you focus on communication the rest will come. Be honest with yourself and your spouse about what you want and need in your relationship. You should be able to express yourself freely and communicate with your spouse to guide him towards a more romantic relationship. Just because men aren't subtle, doesn't mean that you can't plant a few seeds and watch them grow.