I have been witnessing something. We think we are connecting and yet, most of us are truly afraid to be vulnerable.
Vulnerability is what drives receiving community.
We are living in a world that is fast paced and where we can "connect" with someone that lives half way around it. That doesn't mean that we are experiencing true community.
We each have several types of communities in our lives: work, clients, family, friends, intimate partner, peer and spiritual.
I believe that there are elements to attracting a community that is nourishing and supports you. The elements are:
Understanding What You Want Out of Community: Most of us don't even realize we want community and some of us use community to try and fill a void that can only be filled by ourselves. The starter question to understanding what you want out of community is, "What am I looking to experience in a community (and I suggest you ask this for each community - what am I looking to experience with my client community, with my family, etc.)?"
Understanding Your Commitment: Some people say you have to be all in to "get the most our of community". I think that you have to be committed to being present.
There is a relationship field between you and everything on this planet, so understanding what you are putting into that relationship field will help you understand what is being reflected back at you.
The starter question here is, "What is my commitment level with this community (friends, family, etc) and am I holding myself to that commitment level?"
Understanding How To Express Yourself Clearly In Community:Often we do not communicate with others what we are looking to experience or what we "want" from that community. I believe it is mostly because we are unaware and afraid. Just a little awareness goes a long way here. I have a friend who always says, "All needs can be met when they are expressed clearly."
Here are a couple of starter questions: "How do I want to be known in this community? What need is this community fulfilling?" (With the understanding that this community is a resource. It is not the Source for you - that's your higher power).
Understanding That You Deserve Community: The big one! I hear so often from people that they don't know what they will bring to a community, that they don't feel good enough to attract those loving resources...well...if you feel this way, you are not alone. One of the reasons that we gravitate toward community is to understand that we are not alone, to have individuals who understand our ups and downs, and to experience joy in a greater way.
No starter question here, just an affirmation. "Today I am willing and able to accept that I deserve a community who loves and supports me for my essential being."
Why We Need Spiritual Community
So often most individuals (including myself at one time) forget about adding this community to their list. Why? Yes, we can all gain insight from teachers, guides, books and telesummits AND there is something powerful about sitting (either virtually or physically) with individuals who all have the same focus.
It is amazing that when participants in a class share, we hear how alike our answers are and how much we can get a new perspective by hearing what we are studying in a new way. Interaction with others allows us to practice our consciousness and share our gifts.
It is a perfect playground to see where you still feel separate and to allow yourself the chance to evolve in the relationship. I will admit that I would so often just go to the Center, get my spiritual nourishment, and then leave. I will also admit that I could participate in the community a lot more fully.
When you enter into a spiritual community, it is your chance to be deeply nourished and for you to nourish the community back.
It is truly up to us how much community we wish to receive and participate in. Remember, the tools to receive community are already inside of you: trust, courage and movement.
If you have any questions or want to share your experience, please feel free to reach out to me via email.