Emotional Abuse - What is Emotional Abuse?

Social IssuesWomen's Issues

  • Author Lesley Komlos
  • Published November 18, 2007
  • Word count 492

Emotional abuse exists and it is happening all around you but you may never even realize it. By its very nature, it is secretive and the next victim could be your sister, best friend, your neighbor, or it could even be you. Emotional abuse is masked with silence, guilt and an instinctive sense of betrayal and the negative side-effects of those who have suffered at the hands of an abusive partner, parent or role-model are huge and can last a lifetime.

Emotional abuse is one of the most unnoticed forms of abuse. Victims of emotional abuse do not bear the signs visible on those who are suffering from physical abuse. When someone says that they are being abused, the first reaction of people is to look for the typical signs present in a physically abusive relationship, such as bruising, cuts, scars or broken bones. In many cases the victim find themselves in a position of having to convince people of the truth, as often they are not believed. This is particularly the case if the abuser is known to the skeptic, as these perpetrators of abuse are often intelligent, charming and outgoing. Also, any kind of abuser is not going to go around wearing a sign saying "Look at me, I'm an Abuser".

Although the scars are not visible, emotional abuse leaves scars that are long lasting and deeply entrenched in the mind and emotions of the victim and these scars can shape future relationships, actions and beliefs and can have a devastating effect on the victim's sense of self-esteem. Victims of emotional abuse may seem introverted, frightened, quiet, withdrawn or they may appear to be confident, brash and an extrovert which is an act designed to fool the outside world so that they can hide the humiliation of the trauma they are experiencing.

Emotional abuse is always present with physical and sexual abuse but it exists in its own right also. The victim often suffers in silence, scared or even embarrassed to mention it to anyone, they may be left wondering what they have done to deserve this barrage of verbal ill treatment or may even wonder whether they misinterpreted the whole conversation and that possibly the verbal attack wasn't meant in such a vindictive way after all.

Many abusers are in fact victims of bullying or have very little confidence and possibly low self-esteem. If abusers have suffered some type of abuse themselves and have learned to eradicate the feelings of helplessness which comes hand in hand with this, it may mean that they have deliberately chosen not to seek help but have decided that it is better to be the one who is dealing the abuse and not being on the receiving end of it.

If only all those people who have suffered or are still suffering from abuse would seek counseling, this continuous chain of torment and pain could be stopped in its tracks once and for all.

Lesley Komlos was a victim of Emotional Abuse in her marriage to husband Patrick Kilcoyne.

Lesley has set out to try and help others who have also been abused emotionally.

For More Information visit:

Emotional Abuse Recovery

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