The foundation of long-term relationships is essentially the same for everyone, even for single parents. Trust, communication, and love are three key factors that must exist in any relationship if it has any hope to last beyond a few months. As a single parent, though, you need to exert more effort in making a relationship work. After all, it’s not just yourself you have to consider; you need to think of your children’s welfare as well.

To make a relationship last, you need to lay out the truth right from the very start. Never pretend, even at the beginning, that you are totally single and free of obligation. Being upfront even during the early dating stages establishes that you’re honest, and this encourages your partner to be truthful to you as well.

Let your partner know that your kids always come first. This removes any unreasonable expectations between the two of you. However, this doesn’t mean that your partner falls far behind in your list of priorities. The key here is striking a balance between your partner and your children. Even though your kids will always take stop spot in your life, know when to allow your partner to be your number one while your kids take a temporary backstage.

Even though you (and maybe even your partner) have kids, don’t let all your activities revolve around your domestic life. Although going out on fun outings with the children is a fun activity, make sure that you still have dates that involve only you and your partner. A romantic candlelit dinner for two, a weekend getaway to a private beach resort, or maybe even just a movie date—these are the activities that keep the romance aspect alive.

And of course, don’t forget the sex. In any mature relationship, sex plays an integral part. You may be a single parent, but do not confine yourself to that role alone. At home in front of your kids, you are known as a mom or dad; but in the bedroom, you should be nothing else but a sexy temptress or a dashing seducer. Keeping the sexual fire alive provides constant passion and excitement in any long-term relationship.

Constant communication and trust, of course, are two things that you should never do without. Say what you mean and mean what you say to avoid petty misunderstandings that often escalate to major fights. Don’t let niggling suspicions with no strong basis get the best of you. Learn to identify your insecurities. Do you really have a reason to worry, or is it all just in your head? Sometimes, even the best relationships end not because of indiscretion, but because of insecurity.

You will never know what your partner thinks and does 100% of the time. The earlier you accept that fact, the more realistic your expectations of a relationship will be. Provide enough space between you and your partner. Even with a special someone in your life, you still need time for yourself, as does your partner. The last thing either one of you need is the feeling of being emotionally suffocated in a relationship that hinders personal growth. Never lose your sense of yourself so that if things don’t work out, you can still fall back on your own strength to pull you through.

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