8. Listen, listen, listen - - ask yourself – what must it be like in this person’s world for these statements to be true for them? Get out of yourself and get into their world, what is it like to be them right now? Imagine that you are Larry King or Barbara Walters and totally immerse yourself in the conversation. It’s your job!

9. You decide to manage your relationships with others so that you are in control of your emotions, and not a victim of your emotions. You especially don’t want to be of victim of theirs! People that have the skills to be in control of their emotions and to manage encounters with others are way ahead of the game, whatever the stakes may be - - business, social or romantic.

10. Body language – these functions are largely unconscious. Watch space zone requirements. Eyebrows lifting.. eye gazes – And SMILE! Matching and mirroring are moving like they do, leaning when they lean, touching your face when they touch their face. Body language is well known for rapport building. Actually it is one of the lowest levels of building rapport, but it still works remarkably well IF - - -see the next point.

11. Go ahead and do the matching, mirroring, etc - - but keep it beneath the radar! Just don’t be obvious or they will think you are mimicking them, and there goes your rapport! These techniques really work and are very powerful for lowering someone’s resistance and barriers. Another thing, keep it ethical! If you are out to manipulate someone, they can usually tell. It’s the opposite of rapport.

12. I’m going to say it again. Focus on the other person! Especially on how they will feel when you are done talking with them! Did you respect them? Make them laugh or feel special? Because . .

13. When it’s all said and done, a person may not remember specifically what you talked about, the place you met, what it was that you were offering or selling, but they WILL REMEMBER HOW THEY FELT WHEN THEY WERE WITH YOU! And that, in one sentence, is the only thing you really need to know about rapport and how it will bring you success on your way to your goals.

Ok, so now you know what rapport is, why you want to be in rapport, and have the simple steps and some good tips how to have success with rapport.

The other key part of rapport that is seldom talked about is how you feel about yourself. If you don't like how you feel about yourself and where you are at the moment, you may not get an opportunity to practice your rapport skills. You'll turn people off, and they will avoid you. It all begins with you feeling good enough about yourself to get yourself and your ego out of the way and tune into others. If you can’t do that yet, you might shortcut your way to success with coaching.

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