THE EXTREME DATE

This kind of dating involves a dose of courage mixed with a perverse sense of immortality (and liberal amounts of alcohol).

The extreme date involves danger . This one started with a simple SMS: "Wear a biker jacket", and 48 hours later I had driven at 280km/h down one of the busiest highways in Johannesburg. I dined in Hillbrow, danced like a maniac on speed, and went on a midnight mountain bike ride along the Westdene koppies with the city of Johannesburg glowing beneath the Hillbrow tower like a retro-futuristic dream scape.

Extreme dates are about filling every moment with excitement, if not near-death experiences, and are usually initiated by psychopaths and narcissists, who have little or no regard for their safety and yours. They are a hell of a hoot though and a great way to spend Valentine's Day if you're hoping that this one will be your last. - Andrea Nagel

THE SURE THING

The consummate Casanova has a tried and tested bag-o-tricks to ensure success under any circumstances.

Valentine's Day presents the wily cad with several trying constraints, foremost among them is the sickly sweet all-pervasive air of store-bought romance. Overpriced red roses and cheap sparkling wine are anathema to the charming gigolo. But the strategy I will now describe has worked wonders for certain young men about town.

Step 1: Take your target up the hill, preferably a hill with a constant supply of French champagne and a passable view. Charming conversation is de rigeur but more critical is the timing and management of the consistent application of bubbly to the damsel.

Step2: Take her to your lair, where you will have laid out the ingredients for a gnocchi- making fest. This demonstrates your worldly charms to great effect. Not only can you cook, but you can cook obscure Italian things that you need to make yourself.

It's all a ruse as it's a terribly easy recipe designed to impress the target while also allowing for the Casanova to press himself into the small of the target's back while gently guiding her hand over the dough.

Step 3: Eat, drink and be merry.

Step 4: Strike. - Aspasia Karras

THE CULTURED DATE

So you've been cruising down at your local second-hand book shop pretending to thumb through a dusty old classic, while surreptitiously eyeing your polo-necked prey. But where to after you've dropped your mobile number into conversation between the names Blanchot and Delueze, and agreed to take part in that bourgeois ritual that serves as the prelude to the mating dance? A good bet is the opening night of the next art exhibition, preferably by some young upstart who has yet to be inducted into the contemporary art canon . Early arrival is key because whoever gets more glasses of free wine down will have the edge when it comes to the intellectual joust that is the lynch pin of the cultured date. The subject of debate is irrelevant, it's the way you conduct it that counts and the best way to sum up your strategy is this: be contrary. Because nothing is sexier to bookish sorts than binary opposites. - Robert McKay

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