Because you're a divorced mom or dad, you've probably already felt the pinch of not having enough time for yourself. I think that it's a perfect time to let the folks who love you, help you. You can lean on your family and friends now to give yourself some alone time. Don't abuse the privilege though. Just use these practical tips reasonably and you and your children will both benefit.

ONE: Lean on your parents. I know it's a bit embarassing burdening them with what you see as 'only your' problems, because you might have had some words with them because of the divorce. Regardless of the details of your divorce, your parents' role as parents don't change. Even if they disagree with what has happened, they still love you. That will never change. They should be helping you through this tough time in your life. It isn't that much to ask to have them baby sit for you a couple times a month so that you can catch a breather. I suspect if you discussed this with them, they'd agree with me.

TWO: Lean on your ex in-laws. Yep, you heard me right. Every situation is different, and they could possibly hate your guts for divorcing their son or daughter, but your kids are still their grandkids. I have a friend who's ex mother-in-law told her "You can divorce him, but you can't divorce me. I want to experience my grandkids." I'd recommend asking for their assistance when you've got some workaday jobs that would get done a lot faster if you didn't have your children with you - things like shopping for groceries or visiting your divorce attorney. Just be straight and to the point. Tell them you could use their help.

THREE: Lean on a good friend: Everyone has at least one, special someone that they can confide in. Is there one special someone who's always acted thoughtfully toward you and your life goals? Who do you know that really cares for both you and your kids? Talk to them. Ask them for some help with what you have to do now without the husband or wife that you had before. Most people love to help out and I'm sure they'd be flattered by your request if you don't abuse the privilege.

And finally, just take some time to put a plan in action. We all feel better when we have something to look forward to. If you can sit down with some of these important people and make up some sort of schedule, you and your kids will benefit greatly! Then, your divorce won't be nearly as painful as it was before you asked, and, you'll have created that much-needed time for yourself.