• Strong opinions. Those who speak with conviction have been attracting attention for centuries and are often admired even by those who disagree with them. While being too headstrong or close-minded can be repulsive to one’s potential partners, knowing how you feel about a wide variety of subjects can be an enticing aspect of one’s personality. Whether or not the person one is interested agrees with them, a well spoken argument indicates a fair amount of thought and resolve, qualities which future loved ones often apply to their relationships. Keep in mind that the real key to this is balance (as in so many things in life.) Extreme stubbornness is as unattractive as a person who is easily swayed or controlled. Always remember to listen to the opinions of those you care for, or have an interest in, but never forget your own voice.

The Illusion of Confidence: Playing the Game that Leads to Disaster

While there are many more qualities that one may find in a confident person another idea to keep in mind might be that many of the cliché actions of those in the dating world that appear confidant maybe nothing more than an illusion; often these are more of indication that a person is not at all ready to be in a healthy relationship. While some may firmly believe that dating is a game and that to not play by the rules means to lose entirely more and more people are finding that this is not a way to enter into a healthy long-lasting relationship.

• Playing it Cool: This refers to the idea that one may not return phone calls or emails quickly and might even take an abnormally long time to respond in general; also that one will not reveal their true feelings (whether they be mild or extreme,) until they have had complete confirmation that the other person feels the same way, or sometimes they will just refuse to commit by revealing their feelings at all. While acting in a way that appears desperate will almost assuredly repel others, it is not necessary to remain constantly aloof to appear confident. In fact, the ability to share one’s feelings and react reasonably to the response that follows, whether positive or negative, shows that one is not dependant on others for their happiness. Keeping in mind that a certain amount of common sense must be taken into account, one should almost never fear rejection. If one is happy with one’s own personality being rejected simply indicates that the compatibility felt was not mutual and should not make one ashamed. If on the other hand reasons are given for the rejection that one agrees are indeed flaws in one’s personality, the rejection is then turned into a learning tool, those flaws can be helped in many cases and in by working on one’s flaws not only will one improve the success rate for the next person one is interested in, but most often will improve the quality of life all together.

• Fun and Flirty: Typically this game is more often played by, but is no way exclusive to, women: Discussing sex or acting in such a way that would indicate that sex is one’s goal, in order to gain some ground with the person one is interested in, when one knows they have no intention of being physical with that person. Now let me state clearly, this is not to say that flirting, even if that flirting becomes of a very intimate nature, should leave the distinct impression that physical contact is intended. Many people flirt with others, some without the awareness that they are doing it, no person should ever assume that they know the intentions of one who is acting flirtatiously. However, to distinctly imply one’s intentions are physical when one knows that they have no intention of being physical is not only an indication that they believe the only way to impress others is to indicate the willingness to be intimate, or in other words that the person relies on the promise of sex to move forward in the relationship, but can lead to many problems for the individual displaying this tendency:

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