Fear will always be a part of our lives. There are times when fear serves a healthy purpose - stopping us from dangerous situations. But many people allow "fear-based thinking" to make decisions for them, which affects their ability to be in action; often saying "I can't...." before even exploring the possibility.

The objective is to "manage" fear successfully by using daily tools. The goal is not to feel fear again or to ignore them- that is unrealistic. It is part of the human condition. Believe me, fear will surface in some crafty way (the 3:00 am staring-at-the-ceiling syndrome for example). We want to manage the fear in the moment so negative self-talk, self doubt, and paralysis is not created.

The goal: accept fear as just another emotion in your life and turn it into a data-collection exercise.

You may be thinking that this is not possible because you feel fear so deeply, however, this article will give you the tools to achieve this goal, with practice and repetition.

Successfully managing your fear is a very important technique because as you are creating your dazzling life, you will be stepping out of your comfort zone many times. Fear will be a part of that process. But it doesn't have to throw you off course to achieving your dreams.

I have found that there are two types of fear:

Type 1 - Fear of Situations Moving Starting a new job Death Car accident occurring Retirement Financial instability Major illness Starting college

Type 2 - Fear-Based Thinking

Fear of rejection Fear of success Fear of failure Fear of not looking good Fear of being dependent Fear of ridicule

These two types of fears affect your quality of life. It causes you to play small vs. living a dazzling life. It can even be downright destructive.

Where does this type of thinking come from? Usually from our families who wanted us to be safe when we were children. Studies have found that children hear the word "no" more than 150,000 times before the age of 18. We also hear:

o Be careful o Don't do that because you might get hurt o Think twice

This started us on the path of self doubt and second guessing ourselves.

Here is the first "key" in what I call the dazzling life key ring:

Monitor your silent self-talk

Researchers have found that 78 of what we worry about never comes true. Let me repeat that…more than 90% of what you worry about never comes true!

And yet you are choosing to let your fear-based thinking make decisions for you. Can you see the irony (and sadness) in this outlook?

Now, a key to use when you are feeling fear. You don't have to do anything different yet. I just want you to start analyzing the fear as your next step in self-awareness.

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Dazzling Life key #2: Become very clear about what triggered the fear you are feeling right at the moment you are feeling it. What exactly triggered it?

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