So what can you do to ‘turn up the pain factor’ for bullying? Well, most bullies want attention. That’s why they are willing to put up with the negative feedback. Take away their purpose for acting the way they do and all that will be left is the habitual behaviour.

How can you use the ‘happiness factor’ to change their behaviour? The most effective way to curb bullying is to introduce the bullies to positive peer groups. But here’s the issue – what positive peer group wants to have someone around who is a bully? We end up with the chicken and the egg scenario. So the question becomes how do you change the bullies’ behaviour enough to have a peer group want to have them around? Give them praise when they are genuine and they do something self-less or kind. Note positive changes in their behaviour and reward them for it. There are many ways to get a bully to stop his/her behaviour and our programs and books have some wonderful solutions. Every solution available works off of the pain/pleasure philosophy in some way. If you keep this philosophy at the forefront of your mind when dealing with the child your results will increase dramatically.

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