We all do it even if we are embarrassed to admit it; we all talk to ourselves. But what you might not know is that what you say is literally sealing your fate. I always cringe when I hear someone say, "Nothing good ever happens to me" or "I don't have the right connections to get ahead." While these may sound like normal expressions of frustration, they are far more powerful than you can ever imagine!

It has long been recognized that the human mind does not differentiate between fact and fiction, but merely receives whatever it hears as truth. If negative things were said about you during your childhood, plus you have continued to say the same things about yourself as an adult, your mind now firmly believes them to be true and you are probably acting accordingly.

That's why many students that were failing in school were actually discovered to be quite intelligent. They had been told by abusive parents that they were dumb and would never amount to anything, and therefore they believed it and proceeded to live out that expectation.

Am I stuck with my beliefs or can they be changed?

The 20th century novelist William James was quoted as saying, "Human beings can alter their lives by altering their attitudes of mind." And since attitudes are simply habits of thought, the good news is that you can definitely change your thoughts; and once you change your thoughts, everything else in your life will have to respond.

The most powerful tool ever discovered for changing your thoughts, beliefs, and ultimately your actions, is a tool called affirmations. An affirmation is a fancy word for self-talk or self-suggestion. It's basically talking to yourself. And since we've already agreed each of us does that, why not make the type of self-talk you use work in your favor.

How do affirmations work?

Affirmations are positive statements used repetitively to alter your attitudes, self-confidence, and behavior patterns. In time as you constantly repeat positive statements about yourself, your subconscious mind accepts them as truth, which changes your belief, which changes your habits and actions. In other words, new fresh input will eventually override previous negative conditioning.

Steps for developing successful affirmations:

1. Decide what you want to become, what you want to do, and what you want to have. Stating things in general terms, such as "I want to spend more time with my family" will not be effective. Instead say, "I spend an hour each night talking with and reading books to my children." Be very specific!

2. Use the first person pronoun "I" in your statement, never "we." Although you may have mutual goals with your family, each person's affirmation must be stated individually such as, "I cooperate with the financial goals my family has set."

3. State your affirmation in a positive way. Say, "I enjoy public speaking" rather than, "I don't feel afraid when I have to speak publicly." Omit negative words like "don't."

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