When it comes to interracial dating, some racial crossovers are considered more acceptable than others. The most common interracial dating combo is that of White men and Asian women interracial couples. More than 50% of the Asian American women date and marry interracially. In fact, in San Francisco, Jewish-Chinese marriages have become so common to the extent of being dubbed ‘Chewish'.

Is this interracial dating combination the reason for most White men fetishizing Asian women? I have met lots of Asian women who have the similar story some jerk who hit on her at a party with the spark of Asian fantasy in his eyes. "You know those guys who make your insides squeam?" Andrea, a Chinese-American writer, said to me recently." Well I figured exactly what she meant. The thing is, not all Asian women attractions are based on sexual fetish. For some, it is more than that. I met Jason, a composer who has been in a serious relationship with an Asian woman - Japanese. He said, "For a lot of Caucasian men in the United States dating an Asian woman from a somewhat traditional background is like returning to the values of your parents' generation. Instead of dating a woman raised with contemporary values, it's sort of like going back to your mom in the '50s or '60s.

"For Jason, interracial dating or his dating a Japanese lady isn't a step backwards. Jason doesn't see his choice as a step backward, however. He just needs someone with a stronger sense of family and community. "What I see around me in this country is a premium placed on the individual, on one's own career and one's own life," he explains. "That doesn't leave a lot of space for sharing a life with someone. Traditional cultures place value on cooperating with your family, your partner, your children. Asian women are raised with more emphasis on family. For a white male, it's comforting to be with someone who holds that important and gives you the space to let that be important.

"Asian women on the other hand, find interracial dating as liberating. It is expected of Asian women to confirm to their families' traditions. And an Americanized man is more flexible and open to equality than an Asian man. Interracial dating makes them date someone who brings none of those presumptions of their Asian culture to the relationship which is such a relief. Most college going Asian women are in school partially to find a suitable marriage partner, and also to experiment with interracial dating. They're in college to explore, and White men guys are more nurturing of that. They describe American culture as elastic.

Much as Asian families may feel hesitant about having non-Asian sons-in-law, some crossovers are more socially accepted, even desired. An Asian family will frequently welcome a white man.