Actually, all three of Jim’s partners wanted his attention and they all had different ways of expressing their displeasure. We are not saying that Jim caused the violence, the affairs or the depression of his partners. What we are saying is that your unexamined behavior patterns will link up with your partner’s mechanics and produce problems.

Should you stay in a relationship that is violent, for instance, because you have evoked unfinished business in your partner? Of course not. Our point is that your partner is not behaving badly in a vacuum. As we said before, there is no good one and no bad one in a relationship. As Jim became aware of the mechanical ways in which he distanced himself from his partners both emotionally and physically, then he and Dahlia were able to finally express and live from the passion they had for one another and their passion for life.

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