Understanding and Eliminating Fear
All of us have fears. Fear of rejection, fear of public speaking, fear of the unknown, etc. Our fears typically control our lives, sometimes demonstratively, otherwise subconsciously. Few of us are even aware of our fears and their role in our lives, yet we live with them every day. Without being able to understand why we are fearful and what our fears are, we will never be able to conquer these fears.
So, if our fears are central to our very being, without us even recognizing them for what they are, how are we to know how to name them, understand them, and eventually work on solving and eliminating them? Let’s take a closer look at how to find where your individual fears come from, and also how to eliminate them.
Where do they come from?
Fears are central to every living animal. Some are based on primal urge and survival while others take form in less physical form. For the topic of this article, obviously, our focus is on the human condition’s response to fear. Where do your fears come from? Was it from birth? Were you born with your fears? Was there an event or chain of events that set you up with your set of fears? Are your fears real or imagined? These are all the most basic questions you’ll need to ask yourself when beginning to look at where exactly your fears come from.
Chances are, if you are like most, you can in fact-pinpoint the origin of your fear. You know that there was a time in high school that you failed at a public speech, and this is why you freeze up when it comes to any sort of public speaking, scared to death that you will repeat the same situation again and again. Or, perhaps, you were rejected by a loved one, and forever hold that fear about all relationships, and as a consequence find it difficult getting serious about anyone in case you are rejected again. If you have a memory that you can tie to your irrational or rational fear, then you must start here-no matter how painful it may seem.
If you can’t readily recognize why you are fearful of any particular situation, brainstorm. Talk to your friends, relatives, and anyone who has known you for years. You would be surprised how much other people take in in relation to your life. Objective reality is always clearer than subjective reality. Typically, sitting down, brainstorming, and collecting insight from your loved ones will let you start to see where your fears come from. It may be a painful journey as sometimes you just don’t want to admit that you have certain fears or ever experienced whatever painful event made you forever fearful, but this is the only way to heal and start living your life fearlessly.
Eliminating Your Fears
Once you have pinpointed what and where you fears come from, you will be able to better see the direct connection to your immediate present. Once out of the fearful atmosphere that caused you the lifelong fear and anxiety, you can better see the fear as perhaps your loved ones have all along: clearly and objectively. The more objectively you can see your fears, the less connection you will be able to draw between you and it as well as you and your painful past. Since that time, you have had so many experiences, relationships, and times that provided quite probably a different perspective altogether.
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