Are you disappointed when people do not keep their commitments? Do you keep your commitments to others? Do you keep your commitments to yourself? What is happening when we are excited about committing to something and then fail to follow through?

It has been my experience that we make commitments too quickly and do not think about the basic elements in making them. Some commitments are "no brainers" and others require further thought into what the ramifications are in obligating ourselves. However, even too many "no brainers" can use up the time available to assume other more meaningful commitments. Typically we make commitments because we believe there will be some sort of reward for doing so, such as; returned favors, recognition, financial return, spiritual fulfillment, etc. So, it makes sense to notice how many commitments we make and how they give us energy or drain us.

Let’s consider what the elements of commitments are as a method to make better choices and realize more fulfilling results with an example like, I want to lose ten pounds in six months.

1. The Obligation. What is the commitment itself and what is required to keep it? The commitment is to lose ten pounds. What is required to keep it means I will have to use diet and exercise in some combination, at some level of consistent frequency, over some measure of time.

2. The Know How. What is the expertise needed to complete it? I know I will have to cut out as much fat and sugar as I can. I know I will have to exercise using aerobic and strength building exercises. But, I will have to do some research on what kinds of nutrition cuts I can make that are in alignment with what I like to eat. I refuse to eat food so void of flavor that I hate eating and dread tracking my performance. I will also have to do some research on what the correct amount and type of exercise is for me. Why commit to a jogging routine when I have no place to do so?

3. The Desire. How much do I really want this? Is my health in jeopardy with keeping these ten pounds. Am I doing it because I have friends who are and I do not want to be left out? Do my clothes look good on me or do they look tight? Am I committed to a number on the scale or can I be happy being a size 16 and still look and feel great? These questions help uncover the real motivation behind the initial desire to lose ten pounds. The deeper the desire, the more likely we can do what it takes to keep the commitment.

4. The Timing. Do I have the time? In losing the ten pounds, I will have to shop differently, perhaps, at a store that is not as close to my home as I would like. I will have to make time in my schedule to exercise. This means that I may have to give up something else in order to make consistent exercise time. It may mean that my family has to help me by taking on more responsibilities to free up my time.

Is the timing right for me? Is the ten pounds in six months realistic? What other things are going on in my life right now that would conflict with my plans to lose the ten pounds? I may be taking care of elderly parents, working long hours, volunteering, or very involved with my children’s activities.

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