Quite a few marriages progressively lose their initial sheen. Financial constraints and other pressures have their due effect, and this is visibly noticed when spousal conflicts turn more vociferous. But, what saddens people most is the insensitive attitude of the partner that develops over a period of time.

If your married life corresponds to the situation mentioned above, it could mean that you are trapped in a low conflict marriage. Though you are not happy, your life may also not be marked with deep sorrow or violence.

Many marital couples have similar experiences. For all these couples, the next course of action is not divorce but meeting a marriage counsellor. A counsellor helps people bring the happiness back to their married life. And, this happiness is easily reflected in the physical health of the people. For, happily married people are also quite healthy.

You can develop a healthy marriage by developing a healthy attitude towards life. Inculcate the positive quality of optimism. This would help you perceive the brighter side of your marriage and the good qualities of your spouse that has attracted you in the first instance.

Next, develop techniques of anger management. Many people who lack this vital skill, damage their relationships with their spouse and children. For, anger destroys communication links and creates conflicts.

In spite of making these attempts, if you still feel that your married life is unhappy, you can plan for a divorce. Life is meant to be enjoyed and there is no point in being trapped in an unhappy marriage.

Preparing for a Divorce

Preparation for a divorce involves not only preparing legally, emotionally and financially for the process of divorce. It also means preparing for the post divorce period.

Financial Preparation for a Divorce

Financial preparation is a voluminous job. To begin with you must create a comprehensive list of the varied assets and debts accumulated over the years. The asset list typically includes the marital home, other real estate properties, jewellery, silver ware, cars, expensive paintings, bank accounts, stocks and bonds.

Once all the information has been collected, the debts accumulated during the marriage should be subtracted from it. This determines the net worth of your marital assets. This information is necessary to calculate financial settlement at the time of divorce.

A few points must be remembered at this juncture. Separate your credit cards and do not leave your marital home in the pre divorce period.

Once you have collected the requisite financial information, prepare emotionally for the divorce. For, divorce is an intensely painful process. And, you should make every effort at proper pain management.

Emotional Preparation for the Divorce

Seek the help of a therapist. Never try to manage your emotions all alone. Develop lots of friends. Friendship helps give vent to negative feelings of frustration and unhappiness; otherwise children may be subjected to the brunt of your feelings. Forgive your spouse and try to move forward in life instead of reflecting on the past.

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